Communicate, Appreciate and Validate Your Partner

Posted On Friday August 21, 2020

We have good intentions when we enter into an intimate partner relationship. Upon meeting that special someone, we identify characteristics about them that complement our own and fulfill us in some way. That’s what makes them unique.

At the start of the new relationship, there is whimsical excitement, a feeling of euphoria, or bliss in what appears to be a magic-like bubble of two. A lot of time spent indulging in one another, trying to keep one another happy. Peel Regional Police recognizes that no human can keep this caliber of indulgence going indefinitely. Real-life kicks in at some point. A relationship is an endless series of adjustments that can be difficult for many of us.

In every relationship, partners need to be supportive and respectful of each other’s family, friends, children, hobbies, and even their job. Partners need to show patience throughout each other’s life journey, including the struggles and stresses. The most significant debate among couples regarding sharing is how and how much. Depending on their journey, every person has different expectations.

The handling of un-met expectations (reasonable or unreasonable) is what trips up a relationship every time. It is what drives so many arguments. What’s essential for a healthy relationship is how you handle un-met expectations. Furthermore, both partners’ expectations are of equal importance. Therefore, the optimal mutual hope for a couple should be for mutual respect.

If your partner is not meeting your expectations about an issue, avoid getting angry about it. You can be confident that you are not meeting their expectations about a problem as well. Partners need to make an effort not to get angry, share a sincere conversation about both partners’ expectations, and work together to find a mutually agreed-upon solution. If doing this does not yield positive results, seek counseling.

Never handle un-met expectations through punishment, isolation, or violence. If your relationship has taken a violent turn, there are safe places to seek help. Please contact the police via 911 to attend if you or a loved one is in danger. 

In recognition of the complicated and stressful dynamics affecting intimate partner relationships, Peel Regional Police strongly supports healthy relationships and therefore encourages couples to seek help that can protect you both from preventable acts of violence.

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